hypothetically: what do you do when you like your direct senior so much it's making you stupid? like. they trained you. they're scary good at their job. they remember everyone's deadlines and somehow forget their own lunch. and at first you're like, okay, they're just nice. but then you realize you don't want them to be nice to everyone. you want them to look at you first in meetings. sit next to you at drinks. accept your coffee and not anyone else's. am i awful? probably. am i stopping? also probably not.